What I know is this. Last night I went to bed feeling uneasy. I was trying to talk myself into feeling better so I could go to sleep. I need to feel comfort in the quiet moments. The comfort that comes from knowing you have done something good. From knowing that you have made some sort of positive difference in your life lately. For me, it's knowing that I have a gift, and giving that gift of creating something.
I woke up this morning and started looking at episodes of Oregon Art Beat, originally to find a painter who was compared to Mary Cassatt. I remember thinking that this artist didn't merit the comparison because her art was more gestural, and Cassatt although impressionistic had more of a representational style. She was much more refined technically. But that's another topic... As I was looking through the episodes, I landed on a story about Gabe Fernandez. Okay, now I have a base to work with. His style is impressionistic but with enough realism that it satisfies my visual taste.
I went through my own work, and found something that I could see myself painting again. The yellow warehouse in watercolor. I painted this a few years ago. It has promise as a full scale painting. It's a start.